a matriarchal magic story

Over the weekend I realized I'd break the silence of grief's rawest aspects with this particular post.  I feel a personal need to preface it by saying my mother in law is the third most private person I know.  The only two who I'd judge to be even more so are her eldest son and her baby boy, who everyone here knows as my husband.

That said.  I'm not going to tell any of the stories that J and I have been trading back and forth since I last appeared in an electronic form.  I'm going to tell a magic story that would not exist without an ongoing seed.

in this case the seed is money.  The context is my tarot card collection. 

At a certain point her life, when she was just around the age I am now, Mom commenced sending me money for my birthday.  Early into the habit she made a point of telling me she hoped I'd use it to buy something she wouldn't approve of.  My mind went immediately to tarot cards.


After awhile, my ongoing ceremony of selecting decks that really spoke to me came to a T-square kind of crossroad.  People started gifting me with decks that spoke to them of me, specifically.  They were nearly always plant-related.  hmmmm.

It was weird to me, to receive gifts from people that were offered as tokens of esteem as well as special, and generally quite enduring, affection - up until the point in time when I lost so much ongoing human contact through people gone to the virus that I saw everything much differently.

feeling weird or not wanting to shift perspective

is a luxury

and a mighty weird one at that

if it's you're ongoing response-reaction

to somebody offering you a token of honor well-laced with love.

I decided the shifted perspective meant my old one

shouldn't be hard to lose. 

what if I just sank into it? 

so I did.

Since then I've also been immersed in honoring my intuitive streak

since it's so wide

and we've been traveling through the house of intuition's elevated form of Light/Vision.

 i woke up on Sunday morning

and was guided with some of the strongest here-after life force from a departed human that I've felt in my life.

I sat down at my laptop.  I typed 'indie botanical tarot decks' in my search bar  and wound up at a pinterest site and from there a graphic artist's personal website and the deck above.

it's called

The Maiden Oracle

it's part of a thematic and energetic trilogy from gardener and artist Nicole Rallis.  I felt our departed matriarch's presence calling me by a family/real life nickname that sounds/means nothing like 'Acey'

this is exactly what I had in mind, she told me.  Get all three because this is my final gift to you.

but it was the Maiden deck that pulled me in with Light's speed for a secret reason as well as the most obvious of all: 

Maiden = Persephone

NothingiseverythingWhen I first held the box my hands warmed considerably.  When I took out the deck it was as if I'd had it awhile.  So I just automatically started shuffling as if that were true.   Shuffling hand-to-hand with my eyes closed.  What is right now about? Holding them awhile to ask the same question. 

then pulling the above card.

We find ourselves clung to a key to fulfillment, yet we must observe a collection of things, each of which part of the things that will fill.  This Rose appears as a singular event, a bounty worth counting as value well-Spent.  But Jude the Obscure obsesses on an absence of something, costing it the benefit of the craving and the crush.

So okay.  a hot deck in my hands, for sure.  This always gives me a sense of homecoming.  Add to which, bringing it back around to the Sixth Chakra - it's pretty hard to get any more Sixth-ish than this.

I spent a long time sitting with the deck in relation to my secret reason that was understood and facilitated from Beyond. Then I went back and methodically looked through to pick out first my soul and life card

SoulandlifeAnd then my favorites at a blink level



ThesunworldSomething else I really like about this deck relates to its magical emphasis on the waning crescent moon.  This is a great Vision-center reboot and balancer for my waxing crescent workings.  I felt the energy shift come into me in a top-down way, and with it a sense of personal balance seeping into me.  And then I went outside in my garden for awhile.  On her website, Nicole encourages taking her decks into the garden as part of their waking and bonding process.  It's too wet here to do that but the ongoing rain is a great boon for the waking garden spaces.

Last night I realized I was going to follow through on the strong hunch that this was to be a dedicated deck for my secret purpose.   The deck was already 'there'.  It knew exactly why and what it was meant for.  I shuffled for a long time coupled with the request for a final message to me personally.

Persephonecardmaidendeckconfirmation/affirmation squared.

the gentle rain and frequent breaks are a nice mix for getting out and meeting an ever changing garden space in both containers and ground.  I'm overwhelmed because it all seems cosmic and visionary because it IS all that way. 

it's all twining back to roots a lot deeper than emotional processing related to cumulative grief reaching this kind of tidal wave release as well as its tenderest imaginable farewell.

for the next while I'm releasing the prompt responsibility through this blog.  I don't know how much other, more personally creative work I'll be doing beyond co-creative happenings in the garden and, hence, will just ask of myself some ongoing posts to my other blog because I do love to share walks in my gardens.

.quite possibly nothing but pictures for the next little while.


prompt: find your light

Sixth Chakra energy is powered by the element of Light.

Look around your home and/or ongoing landscape for a place you have already established a connection to merging your mind, body, and soul with Light.  Think about what this spot means to you.  Honor it - perhaps each day, or most days, for the rest of our time living in our house of Vision.


I'm going with the way I habitually relate to light by way of its co-creative relationship with the water in our little stream.

water is my favorite mirror.  especially through a camera lens.

I also like the way solar fire merges with water both directly as well from a mentally incomprehensible distance.  Sunlight on water is definitely my favorite form of meditative and restorative way to absorb Light.

Have you thought about this before?

how long has it been since you made a self-care practice

of nourishing yourself this way


Lightedstreamnot a particularly good example but this is how the stream looked when I was outside day before last.  Since then the winds have been so brutally strong that I haven't been anywhere that I might be hit with a crashing branch or trunk.  A lot of cracking, crashing, and moaning that's easily heard/felt in the house.  Before that the water was moving fast due to the merely brisk wind.  The light seemed to be blessing the stream in the line between the skunk cabbage and the rocks on the opposite bank...

and then for moments when I feel the need to dazzle and cleanse my inner reservoirs of vision, I turn instinctively, like a happy plant, to sun on water in another quietly meaningful place: WellfleetcoveWellfleet Cove

I sit on the tiny beach there quite frequently in my morning meditation sessions ...

Prompt: plan a garden ...


This slip of paper arrived in my life yesterday.  I thought: this is a perfect mantra-seed for me right now.  Then I thought:  what if it's a perfect prompt for everyone else as well?


Say you had a fertile growing space about seven foot square - all fluffed-up and ready to go.

what strange and mysterious blooms

would you be happy to welcome,

learn from, and share with other

sentient beings



(turning the plot into a cannabis grow is cheating.  and I mean that on a number of different levels.)



Prompt: do this throughout the lunation

The Sixth Chakra relates to vision/perceptual prowess.

this includes in equal measure:

what we see and how we perceive it


what we project of our internalized visions


since we're bombarded by visually based information and its counterpart

and tend to feel at least partially 'helpless'

(or perhaps giving up too much personal agency and its attendant power)

in the face of all we've witnessed of the whirling world

by the end of any given day and evening

we're going to SLOW DOWN

even more

because now we're in a sratosphere of deep space

there is no linear time

or absolute gravity

this. is.  Mind.

let's treat it with the respect and awe

it needs to reclaim


Every day, take a picture that relates to your visual perception within that day.

keep it separate from all the other pictures

you take for similar or disparate reasons.

this is a project.

give it a file or an album or some other storage category that means when you take/or look at your daily pictures that is ALL you are perceiving.

this is how we'll figure out (I'll be doing this too)

what we are perceiving at a blink level.

by the end of the month you'll see

what's 'really' going on with your blink-time perceptual energy.


pick one of the following, or since it's all so slow, go for both if you've got the space and time.

Tape together two sheets of letter sized paper.  Make sure they're the same weight if not exact duplicates

(i'll be using copier paper and taping them together with dark purple washi tape)

Every day - glue-down JUST ONE thing.

follow the same loose-eyed/no-brain approach

described above in relation to picture taking.


do not plan a picture

or an abstract idea

or what you currently believe to be important

or necessary.

At the end of the month you'll have a collage

that speaks your own secret language

about what's really going on


at a slow and trusting level.

Pro-Tip:  take just a small swipe of a glue stick to adhere your pieces if that's feasible.  That way you have flexibility as the matter of placement begins to reveal it's own unique narrative as your tuck and tear and explore afresh with each new addition.



(i want to do this one, too, but I also want to get my garden planted

and continue immersing as much as possible

in the mindblowing (and extremely visionary)

class I'm still taking.  so we'll SEE.


Find an indigo or very deep purple ground cloth within your fabric stash.

If you usually iron everything

before you work

don't do it this time

and conversely:

if you usually don't

find a way to create a steam dewrinkling system over a boiling pot of water or take your cloth into the shower with you and let it dry on a perfectly flat surface, with a few smooth-outs along the way.

or, y'know.   locate your iron - wherever it is - and press the fabric.

here's why:

we're going to give our existing over-extended mind-perceptions a bit of a break.  Whatever you usually/habitually/feel you absolutely MUST do in order to begin stitching speaks to the brain-hemisphere we most rely upon and, hence, tend to ignore in terms of letting it rest and have a break.

this month:  Whatever feels most NECESSARY to your mind may benefit in the long run from having a few questions asked on its behalf.  Find out if your mind is happy.  Not in the top dead center sense of happiness but more specifically:  Is your mind happy with the way you treat it?  Ask your mind to give you a one word answer to the question:  How do you feel right now?

see how honest

your mind is capable of being to its least receptive audience:



Mind is very quick and easily engaged with something new.  Especially when the newsness fits into something

we habitually do in a different [habitual] way.

stitching is extremely tactile and connects us to our heart center via its energy pouring through the so-called lesser chakras in our palms into our work with cloth, needle, and thread.  There's a third component, of course, within the miracle-magic of hand EYE coordination.

For this particular ongoing prompt

you are adding HEART to Mind.

this can get confusing for people.

The will attempt to 'replace' their mind with the perceptions

that bloom in Heart's ether.


Mind enjoys replacing Heart.

we're told to do as much

practically from birth

and everybody likes to succeed.


Every day select something from your stash that speaks of your internalized perceptual visioning in the moment of selection.


Once you've decided where to place your fabric on any given day, stitch it JUST ONCE into position.

the reason should be visually obvious within the half cycle/full moon point.

Mind is greatly enhanced with an ongoing maximum of flexibility.

the story of tactile heart's eye-hand coordination

will require as much shifting overlaps and redefined edges

as your mind will make

in the process

of discovering itself

in this way.

[am coming up with slow month long project oriented prompts straight out da gate because this center's both my wheelhouse and the place I found consistent solace and peace throughout my challenging childhood and coming of age.  It's why ... the story of my life ... is JUST a story.


having overtaxed and thus thoroughly misunderstood, both the purpose of Mind as well as the ongoing mechanics of authentic 'survival'

I know this month is going to take me places, as the saying goes.

at the moment I'm preparing

by adding the metaphorical equivalent of a surfing leash

to my lower-case mind